in a previous post, "How to Influence Your Boss", I explored how to influence upwards, but just as important is how to influence laterally.
When I teach programs on influence or influence without authority, I ask participants to create a circle of influence like this diagram:
I then ask them to put ticks or crosses, representing ability or inability to influence, against each circle. Obviously some circles will need sub-circles to represent individual key people. This is a useful exercise to map out where you need to develop or strengthen your influence.
In a modern matrix style organisation, your success will be determined not just by what you do, but by what you can influence others to do. The effective manager/leader learns to find out what is important to the people in their circle of influence and communicates to them in terms of what matters them rather than directly stating their own needs.
The "How to Influence Your Boss" post expands on finding needs and...
As a people manager, your most important and impactful activities are the conversations you have with your staff about how they are doing and how they can develop themselves. With this level of importance, it is therefore surprising that so many of these conversations can end up leaving both parties unsatisfied.
Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance, is a maxim I’m sure you've heard; well in the case of scheduled performance and development conversations this is very true. So how and what to plan?
When a human mind has a clear goal and feels motivated to achieve that goal, it rewards behaviors that move it towards that goal with little hits of the ‘feel good’ chemical, dopamine. In addition, when behaviors that move us towards a goal are recognized and acknowledged, we feel more motivated and are likely to increase our efforts.
This realization of human psychology means that before a conversation with a staff member, you must be...
Research has shown that the inability to build a successful relationship with the boss is a significant reason for managers failing or not reaching their full potential.
When I approach this topic, I encounter several mindsets that lead to an inability to effectively influence, these include:
Do any of these, sound familiar?
The problem with blaming the boss is that you have created an external locus of control which is the exact opposite of self-leadership. To influence you must ask yourself, “what can I do that will make a difference?” The purpose of this blog is to provide some ideas to get you started:
Allies have open and honest conversations; they may not always agree but they will listen to what each other wants and assertively communicate what their own needs. "But my boss doesn't...
Executive Coaching has come of age and is now viewed as an effective way of developing leaders. Smart companies are making executive coaching a core element of leadership development; whether that is when grooming a CEO successor or helping managers transition to leaders.
It is therefore not ‘news’ that a recent survey reports 86 percent of US companies hired Executive Coaches to sharpen the skills of individuals who have been identified as future organizational leaders. The numbers are similar in Europe whilst the uptake of executive coaching in Singapore and Asia has been slower but is catching up.
The demand for good Executive Coaches has been driven by organizations demands for immediate results. Executive Coaching provides feedback and guidance in real time, and lasting transformations can be observed after 3 to 6 months.
As individuals advance to the executive level, developmental feedback becomes increasingly important. Many executives plateau in critical...
You may already have broken your 2020 New Year Resolution, but don’t beat yourself up. Self-leadership is about living intentionally NOT perfectly. Each morning get up, set an intention to be a little better today; over time the results will astound you.
Self-leadership intentions are the rules we set for ourselves. If you want some inspiration, here's a list:
So what do you think of this list?
What intentions or rules will you add?
What happens when your motivation goes missing?
In this post, I’m going to share with you, how to find your motivation and how to get going -even when you don’t feel like it. Everyone has things they should do or things they must do, but don’t feel like doing. But you also have things you like to do and things you look forward to doing. So what’s the difference? What’s the secret?
It’s not unusual to struggle with motivation, you’re not alone. Let me share something with you, as well as being a Self-leadership coach, I’m also engaged as a motivational speaker. I have spoken to audiences as large as 12,000 and inspired them to take action. But, I’ve also had those days when I struggle just to get out of bed, days when taking a shower was a major achievement. Just this week the thought of going to the gym, something I usually like doing, seemed like it would be...
“I’m friends with the monster that’s under my bed. Get along with the voices inside of my head”
Great lyrics from Rihanna and Eminem. Great because, they speak to an experience that we can all relate to. The experience of our fears manifesting as voice inside our head.
The voice that can say; “You’re not smart enough”, “Not tall enough”, “Not pretty enough”
A voice that tells you to “Stay safe, Stay Quiet, and “Stay invisible”
The voice inside your head can be your greatest friend or your greatest enemy. This voice is going to cheer you on to success or lock you in a prison of your own making.
In this post I’m going to share with you three Self-leadership strategies, to ensure that you get along with the voices inside of your head and make friends with the monsters that are under your bed!
I have known the acid taste of self-doubt; the...
Imagine a university lecture theater. Tiered seats in a semi-circle, and in those seats, powerful women. Women leaders from international governments; Singapore, South Africa, India, to name a few. Senior female leaders from multi-national organizations. All of these women looking towards a central focal point. I step into that focal point and endure their gaze. I ask this question, “What words is your mind giving you to describe me?”
We all judge, we cannot judge, and my intent in asking that question on the third day of a Women in Leadership program was to bring to awareness that gender bias goes both ways.
“Assertive, Arrogant and Aggressive” – were how some of these women perceived me, and that was before I have even started my lecture (It’s not my fault I look like a night-club bouncer!).
“Confident, Professional and a Leader” were the kinder descriptions. But the point had been made. We all judge, but worse than judging others is...
What sets successful people apart, is not that they don’t have setbacks, or failures but how they handle their emotions during these tough times.
In this post, I’m going to share with you psychologically sound, Self-leadership strategies to develop your resilience & bounce back faster.
If you are reading this, it’s likely that you have experienced disappointment or heartache at some point in your life. Issues like; injury, illness, losing a job, financial problems, failed business, the end of a relationship are life’s way of knocking us on our ‘arse’ and testing what we are made of.
Personally, I have been through a business disruption that took me from owning houses, cars and living the life to completely broke, with zero assets, living day-by-day in a back-packers hostel. After rebuilding my life and starting another business, I was again disrupted by a divorce that I didn’t want.
As an Executive...