As a self-leader your can self-coach yourself to make manageable the obstacle you find in your path. The following questions will help you better understand how you have constructed the obstacle in your mind.
- When you think about this obstacle/challenge do you see at is big or small?
- What if you were to step back from the obstacle, does it seem smaller?
- What are you telling yourself about this situation?
- What would you need to tell yourself in order for this to seem manageable?
Now that you have reduced the size of the problem in you mind, do the following:
- Notice the obstacle has aspect that you can tackle staight away
- Appreciate you have the resources to overcome this
- Imagine overcomming this obstacle and how good you will feel
- Get started
A coaching example:
To demonstrate a similar process let me share an abstract of a coaching session with Jane (not her real name) who had to make regular presentations but always felt physically sick for 3-days prior.
Andrew: What movie do you play in your mind about these presentations?
Jane: Well, I see the boss and my colleagues just staring at me and wanting me to fail.
A: What does that mean to you?
J: Well it means I am in a state of abject fear and hard as I try I still come across as a bumbling idiot.
A: So, what do you believe about that?
J: Mmm, well that’s not who I really am.
A: Ok, so what do you think about this?
J: Well, I guess if didn’t imagine them quite as frightening, I wouldn’t feel quite as afraid.
A: Yes, that’s true, so what have you realized about this?
J: I know my stuff and should be able to get my message across, my boss and colleagues will just have to listen.
A: How is that important to you?
J: It’s important because I want to progress in this company and feel good about myself.
A: What is your desired outcome from this?
J. Well, I will prepare my presentation whilst playing the movie of the team looking interested, then I will give a great presentation and be congratulated by my colleagues.
The coaching session continued with Jane rehearsing the states of mind and skill she needed to succeed, however the above abstract demonstrates how you can powerfully overcome an obstacle in your mind.
To learn more about leading yourself why not get a copy of my new book on Self Leadership .